Choices...

Occasionally I read novels.  Well, honestly, I read them a lot more than occasionally!  I started Hurricanes in Paradise by Denise Hildreth this morning.  It’s about a lady (Riley) getting her life back together after making some very poor decisions which led to divorce and learning about raising her daughter (Gabby).  This morning I read

The divorce had changed so much about her life, and it was often the little things she noticed most.  Days now had to be planned out in advance since Jeremy wasn’t there to call when she forgot an important paper, left the iron on, or couldn’t remember if she had turned off the coffeepot.  There was no one there to help her with Gabby at night or to drive her to the doctor when she was sick.  No, now she drove herself and Gabby everywhere; she made her own chicken soup when she was sick; and when a lightbulb burned out, she climbed up the ladder to change it herself.  Life was different.  It wasn’t the one she had wanted, but it was the one her choices had made.

For reasons I haven’t found out yet, its obvious the divorce Riley went through was her fault.  Her choices led her to this place.  Our lives are shaped by our choices.  Some of us make better ones than others, but we all make mistakes.  Every single one of us has, at some point, done something we regretted.  And…generally, there is a price to pay for the mistakes we make.  Sometimes it’s a very high price.  Sometimes, it isn’t.  It really depends on the “bad choice.”  While the type of mistake you made usually matters quite a bit to people (although it shouldn't), it doesn’t matter at all to God.  He sees all of our mistakes equally and He expects the same thing from all of us: repentance.  True repentance is basically turning away from your past and deciding to make better choices. 

When we go through trials, we can learn a lot from David and his prayer in Psalm 51:

Generous in love - God, give grace! Huge in mercy - wipe out my bad record.

Scrub away my guilt, soak out my sins in your laundry.
I know how bad I've been; my sins are staring me down.

You're the One I've violated, and you've seen it all, seen the full extent of my evil.

You have all the facts before you; whatever you decide about me is fair.
I've been out of step with you for a long time, in the wrong since before I was born.

What You're after is truth from the inside out.
Enter me, then; conceive a new, true life.

Soak me in Your laundry and I'll come out clean, scrub me and I'll have a snow-white life.

Tune me in to foot-tapping songs, set these once-broken bones to dancing.
Don't look too close for blemishes, give me a clean bill of health.
God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life.

Don't throw me out with the trash, or fail to breathe holiness in me.
Bring me back from gray exile, put a fresh wind in my sails!
Give me a job teaching rebels your ways so the lost can find their way home.

Commute my death sentence, God, my salvation God, and I'll sing anthems to your life-giving ways.

Unbutton my lips, dear God; I'll let loose with your praise.
Going through the motions doesn't please you, a flawless performance is nothing to you.

I learned God-worship when my pride was shattered.
Heart-shattered lives ready for love don't for a moment escape God's notice.

It’s all about recognizing that you are the one who made the mistake and that you can’t make good choices on your own – we need God to help us do that.  As David said, “God – make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis-week in my life.  Don't throw me out with the trash, or fail to breathe holiness in me.”  Genesis-week refers to the week of creation.  David is asking God to create a new life in him.  He also asks God to breathe holiness into him.  Holiness doesn’t come naturally, its something we strive for through a daily relationship with God.  When you come out on the other side of your trial, pray as David did “Give me a job teaching rebels your ways so the lost can find their way home…”  Your testimony could easily help pull someone else from the fire.

XOXO

Amberly